The day I admitted that Justin had a drug problem that he was an addict was a revelation . By revelation I do not mean aha that ‘s what the problem is. I knew the problem I just wouldn’t admit it, that was like admitting defeat. No, the revelation was nothing I said or did would fix the problem. I went to pick him up from the city and take him home and as we were passing by Redwater he told me to let him out . I refused and he said if I didn’t he would jump out. There was a corner which I usually slowed down for which I knew he was thinking would be his opportunity. Instead I sped around the corner and kept the pace til we were home. Where he promptly took off . A few days after this happened I was looking through the Shepherd’s guide and came across the name of a drug Councillor so I called him. I was telling him what was happening and how Justin acted right down to the candy cravings. He said matter of factly “you’re son is a drug addict”. Hearing a stranger rely that to me made me realize what I knew all along . I tried to do things on my own up to that point and it didn’t work. Shortly after I prayed and gave him to God , I allowed myself to finally let go and give Jesus that burden I’d been carrying for years. Up to that point I wanted to hold on to him but realized that I needed God’s strenght to carry me and him. MATTHEW 11:28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. ” The reason I titled this a phases is because a church member once said to me that he was going through a phase and even then I knew it wasn’t a phase . I would have preferred a hug or prayer for comfort. I know she meant well but a phase it was not. .
Tag Archives: Jesus
Once Upon a Mother’s Day
I was watching an episode of Criminal Minds and a character was telling the FBI agent about her sister thinking that helicopters were following her. The agent said that was common in drug addicts. Well let me tell you about a Mother’s Day 7 or 9 years ago. The years sometimes meld together in a sea of messy memories. My Justin was not living at home and I was picking him up from the city very early. My other boy was getting baptized that day and it was Mother’s Day so he was coming out to our place and church. After picking him up we left the city . He was still high and all the way home he was certain there were helicopters following him . I told him it was paranoia from the drugs which appeased him for a few minutes and then he would start about it again. Once at home he slept for a bit then we went to church without further delusions.I will not pretend to understand what was going on his mind. It saddens me to remember such occurrences . Today he had more charges against him withdrawn , this happened at his last court date a couple weeks ago. I wish he had not decided to leave and instead stuck it out. The decisions we make affect our lives and those who love us. A bad decision though no matter how big is never the end. If we realize our folly and want to set things right , if we want a better life it all boils down to trusting Jesus . Romans 10:13 says For “Everyone who calls on the name of the LORD will be saved.” That is some truth. Nothing we have done in our life can keep us separated from Him only ourselves. Jesus can help a drug addict , an alcoholic, a liar, doesn’t matter who you are. Sin is the same. I am a sinner who called out to the Lord.
Blessings
At church on Sunday the guest speaker started off talking about blessings. When I came home I started to read the first chapter of a Smith Wigglesworth book. It talked about blessings. Hmmmm. Sometimes it’s easy to overlook a blessing/s when things are going bad or even too good . When circumstances are bad we sometimes cry “where’s God? ” when good we might forget God in it. This past 1/2 year God reminded me of how he blesses in the bad. My husband fell ill just before Christmas. Things were going great. Job was good, we just bought a new van , we were going to visit our oldest son up north for Christmas. For a while my husband had been complaining about pain and more and more he needed to use a cane at home . He finally decided to go see a doctor and had blood work done and so off we went to FT.Mac to see family. We had a very blessed time with our son and daughter in law, my brother and sister in law and my dad and sister . But we had to eventually come back to reality . The tests showed nothing conclusive . My husband went back to work and they laid him off as soon as they found out he was ill. He went on medical EI and let me tell you that was a piddly amount. I was attending a weekly bible study and the ladies were so kind and blessed me with collected change that amounted to a goodly amount. One day I was going to go to the grocery store afterward bible study when I was handed a cheque and some cash from a couple of ladies and gift cards from the church for the local grocery store. What a blessing that was. I think at the time I all I had was 4 dollars and wanted fruit but needed margarine. That was a blessing that day. God knows our needs and if we just take time to see , we will see he is there in our corner. There are family that he uses to bless us and our needs and without family we are indeed lost. My oldest and his wife were a huge blessing , in fact even thinking about this makes me teary eyed . My husband is getting stronger now and looking back at to that time seeing how weak he became physically to now is remarkable. Yes , he still tires out after a long day but he is stronger and doing so much better. The diagnosis is still a mystery . Through it all though God was there in each and every step. At this time my husband is stepping out on a business venture , something that has been on his mind for a long time now. New chapter in our life, this business . When you feel that life is throwing a curve ball , step back and see where God is helping or encouraging you. Don’t let the trials of life strip away happiness. I will leave you with two scripture verses from Phillippians . 4:4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say rejoice! and 4:19 And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Jesus Christ. Be blessed . Our Christmas 2012.
My world 